Posts by Melissa Kornhaus

September 26, 2017 by Melissa Kornhaus Leave a Comment

Get Real

Get Real, a two-hour group experience on authenticity, vulnerability, and judgment with me, Melissa Kornhaus, Licensed Mental Health Counselor.

You may not quite understand what this event is about. Well, it’s meant for those of us who want to be at the forefront of human potential and the expansion of our consciousness. The most consistent feedback I got from attendees of our last group, Get Out of Your Head, was how amazing it was to sit with a bunch of strangers and know you aren’t the only one, you’re not alone AND there’s nothing wrong with you.

That’s the power of being present and connecting with one another in an authentic way. Yet we withhold that from ourselves and one another all the dang time…why?!

FEAR. We’re afraid. It’s that simple. In the addictions recovery world, you’ll hear that F.E.A.R. stands for “f*$# everything and run.”

Well f*$# fear. What would you rather feel? I’ll bet its love: connection and unconditional acceptance. Like anything else this acceptance starts within yourself. (PS if you haven’t heard of this idea of creating an intention, a feeling or a thought in order to create your reality, send me a message and we can chat!)

Think about it…You’ll be unshaken by negative feedback when you are deeply secure in who you are and the fact that you are good, good enough, whole, and infinitely valuable just as you are. Loving yourself is like keeping your shoes shiny and dry. Dirt slides right off a clean shoe but will stick to a scuffed one or even turn into mud on a wet one.

It’s time to reclaim the power you’ve given away, the power for others to ‘do you dirty.’

It’s hysterical when you think about it! We’re all playing the same silly game. We all (at least on some level) hide behind our favorite stories from the weekend, show our best sides to each other at work, then go home and whisper behind closed doors about one another. Check it out. This is our own judgment mirrored back to us, don’t you see? This mirroring means we can change what we’re looking at from the inside out.

Perhaps your ability to be authentic is a measure of how much you love yourself, how courageous you are. It’s a reflection of your ability to tolerate discomfort and the unknown. THESE skills, these are some of the most powerful life skills…above all else, I pray I can pass these on to my children. Imagine what you could do if you weren’t afraid of the unknown, stayed on track when uncomfortable emotions hit, and encouraged rather than criticized yourself!

Maybe you’re intrigued but not ready to commit to coming and investing $20. Why Get Real? Why have this conversation, come to this random group? Here’s another way to look at it…What would you want for your kids? Most parents’ answer is for them to be happy. What would it take for you to be happy? What would it do for your happiness to be able to be comfortable simply being yourself and expressing that into the world? More than money could buy. I’ll bet ya $10 (haha).

Join us tomorrow evening at 7:30 at the Sagely Willow. We have to break through this judgment and fear, burn down these masks TOGETHER, beginning in a space where it might be safest to practice the art of genuine, spontaneous self-expression. Like anything, it starts with a single step. If this topic piques your interest, your step is to call the studio and reserve your space at 561-450-6407 😉 Ditch the fear and follow Nike: just do it.

September 21, 2017 by Melissa Kornhaus Leave a Comment

Being Busy

Being busy is an addition like many other additions that can be overcome. When you ask “how are you?” you usually expect to hear, “Super busy, hanging in there.” And we can help shift this pattern; it doesn’t have to be this way… We can choose to be present in our roles or responsibilities and also consciously choose to occupy our time by knowing ourselves, becoming more discerning and setting boundaries with others. Sometimes our biggest challenge can be setting those boundaries and committing to nurturing ourselves, our souls. Enjoy the opportunity for real “self-love” in this era which has become so loyal to achieving self-help goals rather than sitting in stillness and getting to know oneself!

It is easier to pass bad judgement on someone who is addicted to alcohol, drugs, or gambling than it is to someone who is addicted to being “busy.” Each of these addictions serves the same role! Taking away a busy schedule from an overachieving, busy individual leaves them with empty time to reflect on themselves. The busy schedule tends to fill a void for something they can not necessarily identify that needs their attention. In therapy, I can help disconnect the results of a busy schedule and shift that energy of overcoming the façade sought in the feelings of “accomplishing a lot.” Very busy minds tend to house a lot of clutter, distortions and chaos that may be reflected throughout parts of the body—not only in the mind. Tension in the neck and/or shoulders, headaches/ migraines, stomach or digestion problems can be distress signals from the body stemming from core issues that are disguised by being “super busy.”

Consider investing in self-love and meaningful self-help, and indulge in the silence of your mind with time for yourself. Join me at my next event and learn more about embracing feelings and shifting your mindless to the happiness necessary to build loyal, lasting relationships with yourself and with others!

September 2, 2017 by Melissa Kornhaus Leave a Comment

Why Express Yourself with Me

Expressing your feelings is not always easy. Sometimes it’s even difficult to identify exactly what you are really feeling. You find yourself trying to justify why you are feeling this way – and even make up stories or excuses as to how these feelings came about. Let’s take ownership of our feelings and accept that our thoughts generate these feelings, or vice versa. Choose your thoughts carefully, when a negative or unpleasant thought enters your head, choose not to accept it… in other words (and as the cliché goes) “think happy thoughts.

For most, this is easier said than done; or it can be done with some/maybe most thoughts…except a few of those really hard ones to manage. Those tough thoughts to ignore are the primary ones that need to be addressed in therapy. Leaving these lingering negative ideas in your mind for later will cause them to morph and present themselves again later in different forms…they will continue to torment you and steal your peace. Why allow this to happen? Reoccurring thoughts of concern must be addressed with a counselor that can help you reenact the scenario and give you realistic alternatives, a solution- whether it be to correct it physically (in real life) or emotionally (from your mind to your heart differently). Either way, sharing your true feelings help you understand your thought process and how it can be altered to obtain a more fulfilled you, a NewVu!

August 11, 2017 by Melissa Kornhaus Leave a Comment

Relationship Therapy for One

It takes two to Tango! I tell that to clients all the time when we’re looking at relationships that aren’t going the way they want. It’s easy to blame the other person or people causing you stress, but you play a role in the dance of every relationship. NewVu brings the New out of YOU! I offer what I call “relationship therapy for one”—so what exactly is that?! I help you come to know yourself deeply- in doing so, we recreate past experiences that seem to have shaped your perspective permanently. These experiences tend to reoccur without you even being aware of them, and it’s important to know that redirecting thoughts and negative energy can be learned. Why hold on to thoughts that ultimately hinder your happiness and your goals? I love helping you find the patterns in your relationships or in your career that aren’t working; let’s repair the damage, and let’s also deal with the pain. I guide you through a complete discovery process. We start by building a real connection in a therapeutic relationship where we can focus on your needs and start to uncover the root cause of what’s not going the way you want. Most of the time it’s not even what you think!

Usually the memories or family dynamics that create the most damage are those that were initiated by some sort of “protection” or “defense.” We’re able to discover exactly what those are together as it happens in our relationship, and that’s where the magic happens. In addition, a series of questions can help reveal the general patterns that you seem to avoid or be unable to change yet keep seeing over and over. The breakthrough is organic, pure…and most say it’s “beyond uplifting!” You will realize that helping yourself create a new type of relationship with me can shift the dynamic of any relationship outside of the therapy office. When this is done individually, you have the opportunity to self-reflect without interruptions, a highly effective process! Once that spark inside you ignites, everything becomes clearer because now you understand why you are not achieving the results you want to help fulfill your life. You can now choose to make the conscious decisions you want, shift thoughts and ultimately move on to building the lasting healthy relationships you deserve.

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